Since my last letter I am proud to say, I’m still in recovery thanks to creator and the will power he has gifted me with. I am Native American and attend Wellbriety, a 12-step program for natives. The program teaches steps in a traditional way, it keeps me in touch with a passion I have to seek who my people are and what they have lived for and died for. Alcohol is a big problem for everyone who takes advantage of the substance, especially natives on reservations throughout our world. Alcohol is our biggest problem. We all know what alcohol can do to us all, it is the same on the rez, it seems it has been part of the culture and second hand nature to let alcohol and drugs kill and harm so many of us. My goal as an addict is to not add to our problems. I have committed myself to my recovery and the focus of my recovery is to help others. I am one who will call others on their crap, such as glorifying about past usage of any substance, and talking about the harm we have caused to everyone, even ourselves. I love to speak about living a healthy life, not only in society, but in prison as well. Could any of you imagine if we could honestly understand triggers, risk factors and interventions? If you could understand this, put yourself in the place of your mother, father, your wife and children, siblings and friends and start to forgive and love yourself, you have a chance to find a connection with something more powerful than your own selfish needs. This connection I am speaking of is having and feeling true freedom from any addiction that have enslaved us for so long. I have this connection and it feels awesome. I asked my creator with my whole heart to release me from this garbage, from this prison, and I haven’t used since then. I have been in recovery for 6 years, 9 months and 2 days, and yes, I am counting. I’m counting because the bottom of my very lowest came in prison. I wondered, if I cannot change any of my behaviors now, this will be my life for the rest of my life, so I made a choice to stop destroying and I have kept my word to myself to stop. Step one is really difficult for me. First, I had to be honest. Second, I had to find my faith. Third I had to figure out what hope means. All three together has not been easy. It’s taken me 6 years, 9 months and 2 days to get right with step one, and now I’m ready to move forward to step two. As I leave this letter to all of you, I pray for all of you and may the creator bless you all. I feel so free; this has been my recipe for my recovery. I hope those who have no answer or are struggling will work step one and be honest, first to yourself. One step at a time, one day at a time.
I love you all. -S.T.6